The Shovel Lady: Part # 1

I apologize to my readers as I screwed up and Published Part #2 before Part #1… I hope you enjoy part #1 as much as part #2…It will give you more incite…

The Shovel Lady is a true story, it depicts the ever growing drug use and mental illness in the proximity where we used to live, it ran rampant .

It was a sunny warm spring morning, hubby and I had decided what we each would do that day, he was going to walk to town, take the bus to the farthest grocery store, buy a few grocery’s then catch the bus back home, about a 2.5 hr round trip. It was my day to clean house and keep an eye on the dog, since it wasn’t very safe to leave a pure bread pup outside by itself for fears of it being stolen.

I was in the kitchen doing dishes when I heard a noise, it sounded like a person digging  curiously  I looked out the window but I couldn’t see anything, then a thought popped into my head that maybe my neighbor next to us must have a worker doing some gardening in his back yard but I couldn’t see for a 6 ft.high fence separating our yards, so I just ignored it and continued with my dishes.

It wasn’t much longer after hearing the digging I saw a woman climbing up the back stairs to my neighbors porch to the kitchen door, she held in one hand a shovel and the other hand she was pounding on the door of my neighbors house yelling ” Let Me In! I live here and I want in now!!”,  Well this kind of perked my neighborly interest so I went outside and thought I best inquire to whom she was and why she was there, as I had never seen her before and I knew all who lived there and I knew no one was home at the time, well, the answer I got was a bit strange, she turned to look at me and told me “I have to find my dead relatives, I’ve tried looking for them by digging  in the front lawn but I still can’t find their bones, so I have to get into the house to search inside there for them”!

OK, this was the strangest conversation I’ve had in a while, other then the few drug induced chattering dribble from smoking a joint of wacky weed when I was younger, even then this took the cake! Yum….Cake! sorry…..I digress.

My answer to this wacko was a few choice words picked especially for this occasion ” Get The Fuck Off My Neighbors Porch Or I’ll Call The Fuck’n Cops!”  Her answer to me was to pick up a plastic lawn chair and hurl through the window of my neighbors kitchen door!  I shouted some more discouraging words that I hoped would make her stop but they didn’t work, the window was broken and she was reaching inside and unlocking the door!  I ran into the house and called 911…

911 how may I direct your call? Police Please!… A lady with a shovel just broke into my neighbors house!

This absurd morning was just getting started………………………………To Be Continued

6 thoughts on “The Shovel Lady: Part # 1

  1. I think you did well to confront her T, you never know what she might have done to you! Although it was a true story, and not a nice one, the way you wrote it was brilliant and actually funny! I wasn’t absolutely sure when I read ‘Shovel Lady 2’ whether you were writing a a bit of fun fiction, or whether it was true! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Pretty Wacky stuff eh? !! I’ve been told I have a knack at story telling… 100% true stuff, I’ve found I don’t have the knack of writing Non-fiction, I guess some have it 🙂 and some don’t! I’m a don’t! Lol….

      Liked by 1 person

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